If you’re a parent you know that parenting is quite possibly the hardest job on the planet. We have been given the responsibility to shape, guide, influence and nurture another human, breathing, living being. On a day to day basis, think of all we do for our children! We have so many roles including chef, personal assistant, Uber driver, hairstylist, therapist, teacher, conflict manager, event planner, social skills trainer, homework helper…the list goes on and on. ย Imagine what it would be like if we were paid in cold, hard cash for all the work we do! According to Salary.com, for 2016 the annual earnings of a stay-at-home Mom would be $142,102 while as a working Mom we would be paid $90,223 ย Not too shabby! You can plug in specifics to see exactly what your salary would be here.ย This whole mission of growing healthy, well adjusted, mentally strong and psychologically sound human beings is no small feat.
So often though, it seems that we as Moms especially, are so consumed with our never ending To Do (For Others List) that we find ourselves feeling “tired”, “exhausted”, “taken for granted”, “tapped out” and “burned out”. Not surprising since so many of us forget to put ourselves on the list. Why is this? ย Why is it so difficult for us Moms to take care of ourselves as well as we take care of everyone else? Perhaps because our culture, media, family and friends have convinced us that to be a “good Mom” means we are required to just give, give, and then give some more to others. ย I believe we have been sold the broken belief that to take time for ourselves is selfish and somehow takes away from the quality of our parenting. Not only does this false idea not serve us as parents, it doesn’t serve anyone we care for either. The truth is found in Momtra No. 3: Self-Care Is Not Selfish, It Is Essential. The sooner we can grasp this truth and shift our beliefs, the sooner we and our families will reap the rewards that will flow from a Happy Mama. Repeat this Momtra as often as necessary as you go through your week.
- getting pampered with a massage or facial
- indulging in a decadent dessert (that we don’t have to share!)
- Enjoying a GNO (Girls Night Out)
- getting a manicure/pedicure
- going to a yoga class
- taking a walk in nature (around a lake, along the beach, at a park)
- reading a book about self-care likeย The Motherhood Evolution by Suzi Lula
- entering a Zen Zone with meditation or simply quiet, alone time
- doing something creative (painting, drawing, crafting)
- Journaling about our thoughts, feelings, challenges and wishes
- Coloring your stress away with a book likeย Mantras for Mommas
- _______________ (whatever works for you!)
ย ย So the next time it’s feeling like your kiddo is pushing all your buttons, get quiet and still and check in with your heart. ย You can even actually put your hand on your heart and ask yourself, “have I done something just for me today?” If not, it’s time to schedule some you time asap. Every day? ย Yes, absolutely every day you should be doing something, no matter how small, just for you.
I have lost count of how many Mothers tell me they feel “guilty” for “indulging” themselves when there are “so many other things to do!” Here’s what I know-there’s no room for guilt here. Guilt is not invited to and is not welcome at your self-care party so send it on it’s way! Think about this- even the Sun gets a little break…every. single. day. On her way to the other side of the planet do you think the Sun feels guilty? Is the Sun thinking “oh, I’d like to rest and set and be beautiful, but there are so many seeds I still have to grow.” No!ย The Sun knows she NEEDS a break! ย And so do you. She DESERVES a break! ย And so do you. The Sun knows there will be plenty of time to shine again…tomorrow. ย And so will you!
